STATUS: A have slight cold so not feeling 100 percent today.
What’s playing on the XM or iPod right now? MOONDANCE by Liz Longely
When a writer emails us to say they have an offer on the table, for the most part, we do read the pages right away. After reading some of these submissions, and I feel awful admitting this, but I think the offer is a little suspect. Sometimes the pages just aren’t strong enough for me to believe that an agent has offered. That it was simply a ploy for a fast response.
Luckily, for the most part, I do believe the writer as I can see it. The work might still not be right for me but it’s strong enough that the offer is probably real.
Today takes the cake though. We received an email with “offer of representation” in the subject line. Upon reading the email, the writer revealed that he had had this offer in a biblical vision.
Yep. This one would definitely get the WTF stamp.
Wait–so God is representing him?
Oh no wait. I got it.
Um…
LOL! What will people think up next?
Holy moly.
Speechless…
That’s what happens to me when I take off the tinfoil hat for a few minutes. Makes showering extremely prophetic. *nods*
lol!
It amazes me what you people have to deal with. Writers are crazy people. 😉
That made me snort-laugh! Thanks!
A Biblical vision — priceless!
Holy offer, Batman!
Your WTF posts make for great conversation topics with my friends and family. They get a good laugh out of them. 🙂
Unfortunately, Elijah won’t be able to actually SELL the book until he returns to Earth to help usher in the Messianic age, by which point all print publishers will be dead.
I know, because Joe Konrath told me so.
*removes tongue from cheek*
And here all I got was a form rejection from Christ & Apostles, LLC.
Wowwwww. That’s just… wowwww. I don’t even know how I’d reply to that.
A psychic once told me I’d be a published writer…but next to THE God, she’s obviously a hack 😉 Hilarious! Feel better, Kristin.
Ok. That is all kinds of awesome.
I’m pretty sure that doesn’t count in the big wide world of writers, no offence or anything to that person…
Hey, this can only mean that you are the agent that god has fingered for the real bits of this process. There’s no way out of this one!
Too bad people waster your time like that. I am glad you read more seriously when you get those type of e-mails. Because I’d definitely want to send you an e-mail like that if someone else ever offered me representation.
O_O
Shocking.
I don’t doubt what you say for one minute, Krisin. However, haven’t we all read at least a couple of books that have left us shaking our heads saying, “A literary agent actually thought this was good??!”?
I just checked the last two books I queried you on. One, the response came in one day. Another, the response took three. You guys are some of the fastest responders in the business. How much faster do these people want to hear back from you?!
Ohmy.
Well at least he warned you up front that he is going to be trouble….
Oh wow. I’m…speechless at that one, lol.
Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of publishing, I will fear no deadline: for thou art my agent; thy rod and thy staff they represent me.
That’s…uh…that’s…wow.
With family, friends, and acquaintances, I’m constantly fighting the stereotype that artists and writers are insane and/or alcoholic. I think I’ll stop fighting now…
At least he didn’t say God said to represent him or He shall smite you!!
Oh My God, that’s funny.
We had somebody stop by IN PERSON to check the status of his submission. Which he had sent about an hour before.
I have to point out what an amazing compliment it is to you that despite an offer from “above,” the person turned it down to pursue your agency. 😉
Actually, this ploy was recommended by a young, recently-signed debut author on her blog. This writer was answering questions from her followers as to how to make sure their submissions were taken seriously & therefore read by agents.
I sort of half wondered if people really did that. I guess I got my answer. Yes, people are that unethical.
I was wondering if anyone had done that before too (I would never risk it). Since some agents take months to respond to partial and full manuscript requests, this ploy might actually work. It would be dumb to do it after an initial query though.
Wow.
My first response was: Wow and then I saw that Red Tash said it too 🙂
There is just no other word that comes to mind.
How do they really know it was God? Are they sure it wasn’t the ghost of George Burns?
The giveaway is the smell of cigar smoke, LOL.
Really though, who hasn’t been tempted to do this?
Not the God part I mean, but to claim an offer in order to get things moving. I never did in my agent search, but it was really tempting sometimes.
At least in my case it was for the most noble of reasons. I knew my manuscript was the best thing since oral sex and all an agent had to do was read it all the way through to fall in love, find an awesome publisher and we’d need to buy a riding mower to rake in all the money.
Of course, now I know better. But a guy can dream can’t he?
I still have not started a search for an agent. But that seems really low. I know some people are delusional but that really takes the cake.
I would like to share this on my blog for ebook writers I have. This is something That I think needs to be shared in order to deter this from happening but more important I think we should at least try and keep civil so as agents can take us a bit more seriously. Please let me know either on my blogg or by email.
Blogg : http://omar-ebooks4all.blogspot.com/
My email: Kalamadea1234@gmail.com
Publishing miracle!
Sorry, I just couldn’t help myself.
A biblical vision? What does that even mean. He hallucinated Jesus and Moses talking about his contract? He flipped open the bible and specific letters glowed spelling out your name? Does he have other kinds of visions? Zoological visions where zebras and kangaroos debate whether he should be released in hardcover or paperback or go straight to ebook?
Bonnie Ferrante
Oh dear… Some people… *shakes head*
I’m done. That is too funny.
LMBO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!